3 Essential Keys to Conscious Business Success

Throughout the past two weeks, I've had numerous (lively) conversations about what it means to be a conscious business owner. I've turned this topic inside out to get to the bottom of what conscious business is about. I share these 3 Keys to Conscious Business Success from my own "in the trenches" experience.

In order to recognize your business as a conscious business it needs to match three criteria, and if any one of these is missing... it's not a conscious business. It may be a conscious hobby, or a conscious project, but not a conscious BUSINESS.  Conscious: fully aware of or sensitive to something; deliberate, intentional.

Business: a person, partnership, or corporation engaged in commerce, manufacturing, or a service; profit-seeking enterprise or concern.

OK, so now that we know the dictionary definition of conscious business, here are the three key elements necessary for YOUR conscious business success.

Make a Difference.

A conscious business is one that's committed to making the world a better place. This doesn't mean you have to change the life of every person on the planet (though that may be your aspiration), but you DO need to provide a product or service whose intention is to improve the lives of YOUR clients and customers. Think of it as being dedicated to changing 'your world' and the people who are touched by doing business with you.

 Whether you own a yoga studio or a deli; offer coaching, financial planning or sales training... the question to ask yourself is, 'Am I truly committed to improving the lives of my customers and clients?' If you answer yes, you're one-third of the way there!

Be Profitable.

This key has been the most challenging for me. I've been SO committed to making a difference, I had neglected to analyze each of my businesses on its' own 'legs' to see if it's profitable. It had been easy to overlook the specific numbers when, overall, things are in the black. So, I ask you to do the same thing I did. This is especially important if you have multiple businesses and income streams. Here goes! 

Spend the afternoon with your books. Sorry, I don't mean Conversations with God or Think and Grow Rich; I'm talking about your QuickBooks. Yup. Go ahead and do it. Pull up your profit and loss (PNL) statements and read what they have to say. Is more money going out than coming in? Is one division of your business supporting another division that's costing you money? Does the business look 'on paper' like you thought it would? Is there money leaking out of your business? Are you on track to reach your financial objectives? Hint: One of your objectives needs to be profitability! 

If your business isn't profitable, it's time to do what it takes to become profitable. And, if you're like me, your commitment to conscious business may cause you to face some difficult decisions. 

Be Your Best. 

This key is critical because it involves how you FEEL, everyday, as you go about working 'in' and 'on' your business. I was reading the Abraham-Hicks book, Ask and It Is Given on the treadmill yesterday and the book drives this point home. Abraham-Hicks reminds you that your most important priority in manifesting your dreams is to feel good. The question to ask here is, 'Does my business cause me to feel good? Does it support me in being my best?' 

Your conscious business should be a source of positive emotions, a vehicle for full self-expression, a way to fulfill your destiny, and fuel for being the best you can be. If your business is not a source of feeling good, identify what doesn't feel good about it. And, then begin to eliminate or transform those aspects that have been pulling down your emotions. Your goal is to have your business fully engage you in experiencing positive emotion! 

The good news about being a conscious business owner is you're awake and aware to every aspect of your business. From this perspective, you stand in the most powerful position to take action in creating the business (and life) of your dreams.

About the Author: Christine Kloser, Founder of the Conscious Business Circle, publishes the Conscious Business Connection ezine. If you're ready to integrate tangible business strategies with Universal principles to achieve results faster... and easier, get your tips now at www.ConsciousBizReport.com. Copyright 2007 Christine Kloser. Article Source: articlecircle.com

Your words and thoughts have physical power - Will Smith

President Clinton Endorses Network Marketing & Direct Selling

Update and Bible.com Find

I have been so busy lately that I haven't had time to blog.  Business has been booming for me during this Christmas Holiday!  I am so grateful!  I hope you are all enjoying your Christmas vacations and your home and lives are full of love and joy.  I've missed you guys!  Anyhow, I finally had time to sit down and browse the internet today and I paid a visit to one of my favorite websites: www.Bible.com.  I read the daily devotional and, like always, I have to share it!

There is a lot going on in the world today.  Between national disasters, people losing their jobs and homes, and what's going on in the world government, there are a lot of people that are suffering right now.  People are hurting and looking for a way out.  Many turn to alcohol.  Alcohol is not a bad thing.  It can actually help ease the pain when you're hurting.  It is not to be abused.  Like the old saying goes, "Too much of anything can hurt you."  (I think that's the way the old saying goes.. lol)  There are also many drunks in the world that have allowed alcohol to ruin their lives and the lives of others.  Did you know that the bible speaks of alcohol?  Check out today's Bible.com daily devotional...  (I've got to get back to my studies... :))

Always Wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom! xoxo
Monique Bradford - The WifeyMommyPreneur~

Proverbs 31:4-7 (KJV):
4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine; nor for princes strong drink:
5 Lest they drink, and forget the law, and pervert the judgment of any of the afflicted.
6 Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts.
7 Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more.

Proverbs 31:4-7 (AMP):
4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel, it is not for kings to drink wine, or for rulers to desire strong drink,
5 Lest they drink and forget the law and what it decrees, and pervert the justice due any of the afflicted.
6 Give strong drink (as medicine) to him who is ready to pass away, and wine to him in bitter distress of heart.
7 Let him drink and forget his poverty and (seriously) remember his want and misery no more.

Thoughts for the Day 

 

These verses from Proverbs are a mother's advice to her son, who is king, and she warns of the danger of drinking wine and strong drink because it causes one to forget what the law requires, and pervert justice, especially in the cause of those who are afflicted. The only time, according to these verses, that alcohol is recommended is when a person is in pain or extreme distress, and then it can be administered medicinally. Even today, we find alcohol as an ingredient in a number of prescription compounds, and they can be used for good, when the situation calls for it; however, this mother knew that to be a wise king, it would be best to avoid drinking wine and alcohol altogether.

Drinking alcohol has perverted the judgment of many people, causing great heartache for those who are its victims. This was a wise mother who gave this advice. Drinking wine was popular during Bible days and many references are made to this act. Does the Bible say it is sinful to drink wine? The answer to this question is that the wine itself is not sinful, because sin is in the heart of man and does not exist in any object of itself. It is the drunkenness and intoxication that come about, when a man drinks too much, that causes him to sin. The Bible teaches discipline and moderation; even eating too much food is a sin and is called the sin of gluttony in the Bible.  

The problem with drinking wine or strong drink is that it causes poor judgment and also changes many people's personalities. Men can end up raging and brawling and doing things in a drunken stupor that are very unwise and that they will also regret. The Bible does make a distinction, as to the affect that strong drinks (alcoholic beverages like whiskey, vodka, etc.) have on a person, as opposed to wine, showing that the strong alcoholic drinks are far worse at causing men to become out of their heads and violent. The wine is bad enough, as it can cause men to lose their senses due to their inebriation.

So what should our position be as Christians, since we know the many sorrows that drunkenness causes? We know that alcoholism is responsible for many broken homes because of the abusive behavior toward family and others. We know the many deaths on our highways caused by drinking and driving. What about the many premature deaths caused by health problems stemming from alcoholism? Yes, drunkenness is a very evil sin that hurts the whole nation. The Bible says all drunkards who do not repent will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Although a Christian may be free to drink moderately as long as they do not become drunk, is that the highest and wisest thing we should do? Paul stated in the New Testament that he would not allow his liberty to be a license to sin, nor would he do anything that would cause a brother to stumble.

Galatians 5:13: "For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty; only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one another."

1 Corinthians 8:9: "But take heed lest by any means this liberty of yours become a stumblingblock to them that are weak."

We must all give an account of ourselves before our Lord. What would please Him? Would it not be pleasing to Him, if we loved others enough to give up those things we could have, for a greater cause? Would it not be a more powerful witness to others in our age to stand out as one who did not drink alcoholic beverages because we had no need to do so? When we are filled with the Spirit of God, His spirit gives us the joy and release that many are seeking by drinking. May we instead desire to be filled with the Holy Spirit and have no need for "spirits."

Ephesians 5:18-20:
18 And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;
19 Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;
20 Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;

Prayer for the Day 
 

Dear Heavenly Father, What wonderful advice we find written in the pages of the Bible. May we all adhere to the wisdom we find in it, and especially the wisdom given for kings. Lord, spiritually, You have made us kings and priests, so we need to act like a king and a priest. We need to be wise and holy, so we can rule and reign in a dark and evil world. Deliver us from all things that would cause us to have poor judgment and give us Your wisdom. May I live a righteous life before the world and be a true and faithful witness for You. I ask this in the name of Jesus. Amen.

Facebook "Fight Against Child Abuse" Movement

I have officially joined the "Fight Against Child Abuse" Movement on Facebook.  I think it's an awesome cause and I'm so glad that people are stepping up to protect the children of our world, by saying "Hey!  This is wrong!  It's never alright to abuse a child!"  I am all for it!  With that said, I, along with many other FACEBOOK Users will be a cartoon characters until Monday, December 6th.

The reason that I wanted to blog about this is because: #1 - I wanted to bring awareness to the issue of Child Abuse

#2 - You have to read this poem!  I copied it from the Official "Fight Against Child Abuse" Facebook "Info" Page.  It is heart breaking.  It really sheds light on the reality of child abuse from a child's perspective.  

Below is the copy of the poem.  Brace yourself.  Like the creator of the Facebook Page said, "This will make you sick!"

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom!

Monique Bradford (The Smirf) ~  The WifeyMommyPreneur  

My name is Sarah
I am but three,
my eyes are swollen
I cannot see.

I must be stupid,
I must be bad,
what else could have made
my daddy so mad?

I wish I were better,
I wish I weren't ugly,
then maybe my Mommy
would still want to hug me.

I can't speak at all,
I can't do a wrong
or else I'm locked up
all the day long.

When I awake I'm all alone
the house is dark
my folks aren't home.

When my Mommy does come
I'll try and be nice,
so maybe I'll get just
one whipping tonight.

Don't make a sound!
I just heard a car
my daddy is back
from Charlie's Bar.

I hear him curse
my name he calls
I press myself
against the wall.

I try and hide
from his evil eyes
I'm so afraid now
I'm starting to cry.

He finds me weeping
he shouts ugly words,
he says its my fault
that he suffers at work.

He slaps me and hits me
and yells at me more,
I finally get free
and I run for the door.

He's already locked it
and I start to bawl,
he takes me and throws me
against the hard wall.

I fall to the floor
with my bones nearly broken,
and my daddy continues
with more bad words spoken.

'I'm sorry!' I scream
but its now much too late
his face has been twisted
into unimaginable hate.

The hurt and the pain
again and again
oh please God, have mercy!
oh please let it end!

And he finally stops
and heads for the door,
while I lay there motionless
sprawled on the floor.

My name is Sarah
and I am but three,
tonight my daddy
murdered me.

There are thousands of kids out there just like Sarah. And you can help

It sickens me to my soul, If you are affected by this poem, do something about it!! So all I am asking you to do is take some time to send this on and acknowledge that this stuff does happen, and that people like her dad do live in our society , and pray for child abuse to wither out and die, but also pray for the safety of our youth.

Please pass this poem on as a Blue Ribbon Against Child Abuse because, as crazy as it might sound, it might just indirectly change a life.



*~*~*AGAINST CHILD ABUSE*~*~

The Entrepreneur's Push (Video Inspiration)

Those who decide to travel the path less traveled will have hardships that only others who've traveled the same path can understand.  As an entrepreneur, there are times when you need a little push, a little inspiration.  I should know.  There are times when I find myself desperate for something to inspire me.  Like today!

Since today is Sunday, I really didn't feel like working, so I lounged around the house.  While I was sitting on the couch watching "The Magic School Bus" with my daughter, which was rather enjoyable, all I could think about was marketing campaigns and orders that I had put in and deliveries that have been sent out and blog ideas and the list goes on and on.

And so to clear my mind, I politely excused myself from the couch and grabbed some magazines.  I subscribe to a lot of magazines to stay up on what's going on in business, network marketing, fashion, parenting and family fun.  I just knew that I would be inspired by some article or picture or something.  Nothing...  So I decided to jump on youtube.  And I found these videos...  They put a smile on my face and now, I share it with you hoping that it will do the same for you!

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom!
Monique Bradford~  The WifeyMommyPreneur

5 Bible verses about money every Christian should know

By Guest Author: Bob of Christianpf.com

Let me start by saying that it was difficult to create this list. Think about it, I am trying to pick the best verses from the Bible about a particular topic. Are there really best verses, or are there just those that have impacted us more than others? I tend to think the latter.

 So, this list is just that. These are the 5 verses that, even as I just scratch the surface of understanding them, have revolutionized my financial life. Each one of them has had a strong impact on many decisions in my life. I hope you allow them to impact you as well.

1. Philippians 4:19

And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

If you have lived much life at all, you are probably well aware that putting your trust in the economy, your employer, or your bank account is not a good idea. They are all fair-weather friends. They all can be helping you greatly one minute, and then the next everything has changed.

God, however is always faithful. That is why we should always be trusting Him as our supply! It doesn’t matter if there is a financial crisis, if you get laid off, or your 401k loses 37% – God will still supply your needs. Just like He promised.

2. Malachi 3:10

Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the LORD Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it.”

It is a bold step of faith to start tithing. Cynics sometimes argue that tithing is not required in the New Testament. I actually agree, since our salvation is no longer based on works, but on faith in Jesus. But there is no escaping the truth that tithing opens the door for blessing that can not be opened without doing it. From my own personal tithing experience, I can attest that I am so overwhelmingly convinced beyond any shadow of a doubt that tithing increases blessing, that I will never live any other way.

3. 1 Timothy 6:10

For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.

This verse is so often misquoted that it is almost laughable. Money is not evil. The love of it is. Having a million in your bank account doesn’t mean that you love it. Having $5 in your account doesn’t prove that you don’t.
For example, Warren Buffett has billions in his accounts, but he is giving almost all of it away to benefit the lives of others. On the other hand I have heard stories of people getting killed over a matter of $20. It is a matter of the heart that only God can judge.

4. Acts 20:35

In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’

Giving sets us free, while hoarding entraps us (James 5:2). Giving changes the lives of others (John 3:16). Giving brings blessing back to us (Luke 6:38). Giving allows us to store up treasures in Heaven rather than here on the earth (Matthew 19:21). Giving really is fun – we need to be in on it.

5. Proverbs 22:7

The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is servant to the lender.

The freedom of being debt free has always been so incredibly enticing to me that I have been willing to give up a whole lot in exchange for it. The last 3+ years my wife and I have been diligently chopping away at it, passing up opportunities to spend as frivolously as some of our peers have done. Getting out of debt is not easy and often requires a fight, but the freedom that comes with it is so worth it.
All verses from the NIV

Couples and Money

My motto is "Each One Teach One." Well, it's one of my motto's.  As I was browsing the internet today I came across this great article and I had to share it with you guys.  Money does matter in relationships.  There is no way around it.  This article has lot's of tips on how to come together as a couple and discuss what some think is unbearable "Money!"  Enjoy!

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom!
Monique Bradford~  TheWifeyMommyPreneur

How to Talk the Talk

Psychologists say that many people will talk about anything, even sex, before they'll talk about their finances. Why is it so difficult for us to talk about money? Perhaps because money symbolizes different things to different people: power, control, security, or love, for instance.

It's been estimated that money issues are the driving force in 90% of divorces, but you CAN live happily ever after, financially speaking, if you work at not letting financial issues come between you and your partner.

In her book "Talking Money," Jean Chatzky, columnist for Money magazine and regular contributor to the Today show, offers practical advice for talking to your spouse or life partner about this emotionally charged issue, including these tips for twosomes:

Find a Neutral Time
Don't wait until your spouse has charged up a storm on the credit card or another hot financial issue arises to broach the subject. The goal is to have a calm, relaxed discussion when there's no particular money issue at hand.

Give a Little to Get a Little
Volunteer your own feelings about a financial issue and it may encourage your partner to do the same. If your relationship is the first priority, you'll both have to be willing to negotiate. Share your feelings, experiences, and hopes about money. Discuss how your parents dealt with money, what it meant to you when you were growing up, and how you dealt with it in past relationships.

Know Where You Stand
Be honest with yourself about how you feel. If you've always been independent, for example, it may be hard for you to be "taken care of" financially. If you have more assets than your partner, you may feel fear about risking your hard-earned money, or resentment if his or her spending habits are not good. You have to be honest with yourself about these feelings in order to be honest with your partner.

Bring in a Third Party
If you can't seem to talk about finances, seek out a counselor to help you sort through your financial issues. This could be a financial counselor or a therapist or marriage counselor.

Do's and Don'ts for Couples
Chatzky also offers these do's and don'ts for merging your finances:

• Track Your Spending Knowing where your money is going is the first key to financial security, and keeping a budget, which includes tracking your spending, is the only way to really know where your money is going. For more information on budgets that work, see Budgeting 101.
  
• Agree to Disagree Come up with spending and savings goals and guidelines, then let your partner manage his or her own spending money. For more information on setting spending and savings goals, see The Secret to Saving Money, and Financial Goals.
• Designate a Bill Payer One of you is likely to be better at day-to-day management of the household expenses. It's okay to designate this person as the bill payer, but the other person should be involved and should know what needs to be done and how to do it.
• Keep Separate Credit Cards Each of you should have at least one credit card in your own name in order to maintain a separate credit history. If you divorce or your spouse dies, it will be difficult or impossible to get a mortgage, loan, or credit card without it. Having a joint card with both your names on it doesn't work.

If you're interested in finding out more about "Talking Money," visit the Financial Planning Bookstore. More Money Articles

Article Source: http://financialplan.about.com/cs/familyfinances/a/CouplesMoney.htm

Sex And Marriage: How To Keep Your Sex Life Alive in Your Marriage

I thought this was a great article and I had to share it here on my blog.  Again...  One of the things stressed in this article is "Communication".  Soooo important in any relationship.  If you can't communicate with your mate on a normal day to day level, how will you ever experience a truly intimate relationship?  I'm talking mentally, emotionally and physically.  I hope that this article will help keep your marriage both Romantic and Fun!  xoxo

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom~
Monique Bradford~  The WifeyMommyPreneur

How To Keep Your Sex Life Alive in Your Marriage

Sex doesn't have to get boring in marriage. As the years go by, your sex life should get better. Here are some ways to keep your marriage and sex life fresh.

Difficulty: Average
Time Required: varies

Here's How:

1. Communication is the key to a healthy and active sex life in a marital relationship, so talk with one another more! 
2. Share with one another your sexual desires.
3. Talk with one another about your expectations concerning lovemaking. False or unmet expectations can hurt your marriage.
4. Sexual intimacy is a continuing process of discovery. True intimacy through communication is what makes sex great.
5. Sex in a long lasting relationship can deepen and become a richer experience. No matter how many times you have made love to each other, the wonder and awe of mutual attraction can still be there.
6. When life becomes busy, and schedules are hectic, plan for sexual encounters with one another. Make sex one of your main priorities.
7. Try to set the mood in advance.
8. If you want to have good sex at night, start the foreplay in the morning.
9. Let your spouse know you care and are thinking about him/her throughout the day by notes, e-mails, phone calls, hugs, etc.
10. Don't expect your spouse to be the only one in your marriage who is responsible for romance. You both need to take responsibility for having an intimate and successful marriage.
11. Hold hands more often.
12. Schedule date nights.

Tips:

1. Being grouchy all day or ignoring your spouse during the day hurts your chances of having a positive lovemaking experience that evening.
2. Remember that sex isn't going to be perfect each time. Don't compare your sex life to the ones you see in movies or on television.
3. Recognize that abstinence now and then can be beneficial to your relationship if you start to lust after one another more.

What You Need:

• Good Communication
• Love for Each Other
• Willingness to Make Time for Each Other
• Date Nights

Article Source: http://marriage.about.com/cs/sex/ht/sexlifealive.htm

My Bible.com Daily Devotional Read~

It has been a wonderful Saturday so far.  I woke up in the middle of the night to check on my daughter and she had a fever.  I gave her some Children's Motrin to bring her fever down and she has been fine since.  Yes!  I feel like I knocked it right on out of her.  I hate it when she's sick.  God is so good~  Anyway I was starving for the bread of the word today and I decided to take a look at www.Bible.com  This is my go to for the word.  I have learned so much about the Word of God from this website and I would encourage anyone who is seeking God to check it out.  Here is a copy of today's daily devotional from: www.Bible.com Thought I'd share it with you guys.  Hope you day has been filled with Love and Laughter~  xoxo

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom~

Monique Bradford~  The WifeyMommyPreneur 

Proverbs 28:17-18 (KJV):
17 A man that doeth violence to the blood of any person shall flee to the pit; let no man stay him.
18 Whoso walketh uprightly shall be saved: but he that is perverse in his ways shall fall at once.

Proverbs 28:17-18 (AMP):
17 If a man willfully sheds the blood of a person (and keeps the guilt of murder upon his conscience), he is fleeing to the pit (the grave) and hastening to his own destruction; let no man stop him!
18 He who walks uprightly shall be safe, but he who willfully goes in double and wrong ways shall fall in one of them.

Thoughts for the Day  

These verses from Proverbs tell us there is a penalty for murder; however, there is a way to be saved, even when someone is guilty of murder. Verse 17 tells us that when a person sheds the blood of someone, they are on their way to the pit (the grave and hell), as a man will reap what he sows. The penalty in the Bible for murder was the death penalty. This verse tells us not to try to stop that process. However, there is one way a man can be saved from going to hell, even if he is guilty of murder. That way is to come to Christ and ask for forgiveness and accept what the shed blood of Jesus did for him on the cross.

Capital punishment is a difficult subject to discuss, as there are many different opinions that all contain some truth about this issue. Some believe it is fair and just to administer the death penalty when criminals take a life or lives, while others think that it is cruel and unusual punishment for civilized societies. Many Christians are divided on this issue as well, with some following the Old Testament law of capital punishment and others choosing the seemingly gentler side of the Bible--the New Testament--as the basis for their opposition to this law. Are these two Testaments in opposition to each other? Since God does not contradict Himself, perhaps we need a deeper understanding of the Bible as a whole.

In many nations murder, treason and other high crimes are punishable by death. Usually the state or governments set the standards for carrying out this punishment. However, before governments established this practice, the idea of capital punishment was first instigated by God in the Old Testament in the Bible.

Genesis 9:5-6:
5 And surely your blood of your lives will I require; at the hand of every beast will I require it, and at the hand of man; at the hand of every man's brother will I require the life of man.
6 Whoso sheddeth man's blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.

Why did God institute capital punishment? Why would a loving God who is supposed to love all of mankind issue these edicts? To answer this question, we must understand the overall purpose of God. God knew when He created men with free wills that not all would follow and obey Him. However, He also knew that many would want to love and serve Him. In giving men free will, He also had to establish laws for men to live by. When we look at the Ten Commandments listed in Exodus 20:1-17, we can see that these laws were given for the good of mankind. One of these laws is in verse 13: "Thou shalt not kill." You may wonder if God said "do not kill," why He would then decree that a murderer should be put to death. The reason is that the Hebrew meaning of the word translated as "kill" actually means "murder" or "to slay someone in a violent manner unjustly." So, in the Ten Commandments God is saying, "Thou shalt not murder."

God sanctioned government authorities to enforce laws. God set boundaries on mankind by establishing ruling authorities that would make and enforce the laws He gave. The purpose for this was because He knew unregenerate society, without any restraints, would seek to destroy good men. God's desire is that all men would come to Him and live by His laws. However, when Adam and Eve disobeyed God and broke His law, sin entered into the world and was passed down to all of mankind through Adam's seed. God, in His love for mankind, made a way for men to come back to Him, through the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus. Now those who accept what Jesus did and repent of their sins can find their way, through faith, to be reconciled to God. This sacrifice covers and cleanses men even from the worst of sins, including murder. Now, through Christ, even murderers can be forgiven and restored to a relationship with God, so they can live forever with Him.

Where we find most of our problems with the two sides of capital punishment is that really both sides hold a truth of God. God's law of justice, for the taking of a life, demands that life be taken; yet, God's spiritual law of mercy and forgiveness grants that a murderer can be forgiven and restored. How can we reconcile this? We must understand that God instituted civil authorities to maintain order in the earth. God uses them to restrain evil and they should be obeyed for this purpose. From these verses, we see that governments can elect to practice capital punishment, the harshest form of punishment, and God sanctions it for the purpose of evil being restrained in the earth.

Romans 13:1-5 (RSV):
1 Let every person be subject to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those that exist have been instituted by God.
2 Therefore he who resists the authorities resists what God has appointed, and those who resist will incur judgment.
3 For rulers are not a terror to good conduct, but to bad. Would you have no fear of him who is in authority? Then do what is good, and you will receive his approval,
4 for he is God's servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword in vain; he is the servant of God to execute his wrath on the wrongdoer.
5 Therefore one must be subject, not only to avoid God's wrath but also for the sake of conscience.

For those who refuse to allow His reign in their lives, God has set government authorities in the earth to restrain evil by enforcing the laws of the land. Granted, some are imperfect. However, the alternative would be that evil would overcome those that were good, if there were no laws and no one to enforce them.

Prayer for the Day  

Dear Heavenly Father, The sacrifice of Jesus shedding His blood on the cross so that mankind could be saved is beyond our understanding. It is awesome to think that even a murderer, who comes to You and repents of his sins, can find forgiveness and be made whole. Thank You for forgiving us and fill our hearts with love and forgiveness towards those that have hurt and abused us. May we extend mercy towards others, so that when we need mercy, we will have some in our storehouse. I ask this in the name of our merciful Lord, Jesus Christ. Amen.

So what did you think?  Do you believe that a murderer should be given the death penalty?  Or do you think that a murderer has a right to forgiveness and mercy even after taking the life of another?

The Importance of "Authority" in Attraction Marketing

When trying to build a presence online, most online marketers are not aware of the importance of “authority.”  Authority is huge in Google’s books.  Quite simply, Google ranks sites considered by the Internet public as authoritative, much higher than it does sites that reflect little authority.  This statement begs the question, “What do you mean by authority in the context of Google and search engine optimization?”

To answer this question let’s consider a couple of quotes by Google’s founders, Sergey Brin and Larry Page.  Sergey is often quoted as once saying, “We believed we could build a better search.  We had a simple idea, that not all pages are created equal.  Some are more important (than others).”
On another occasion, Google co-founder Larry Page stated, “It’s quite complicated and sounds circular, but we’ve worked out a way of calculating a web site’s importance.”  The keyword here friends is “importance.”

Matt Cutts, Head of Google Web Spam Team, once advised . . . “To rank well, build a site so fantastic that it makes you an authority in your niche.”

Having an online presence with a personal website or blog offers one of the greatest attraction marketing opportunities one can create.  However, the majority of website and blog owners don’t realize that web marketing and search engine rankings have evolved to a whole new paradigm that rewards the most authoritative websites.

Once again, “What do we mean by authority?”   Quite simply, websites that exhibit qualities of authority are as Google’s Matt Cutts pointed out, websites that can make you “an authority in your niche.”  You may or may not already be an expert in your field.  But I can assure you of one thing, if you don’t go about the business of building your website or blog “regularly, consistently and persistently,” it’s hard to sustain any authority you might achieve online.

Sure, people who might know you to be an expert in your field might come to your website regularly, but for you to build an ever-growing presence online, made up of  a steady growing stream of new site visitors each day, you will need to achieve high search engine rankings.  To achieve, AND KEEP, high search engine rankings you must build a website that is perceived by Google’s mathematical algorithms as “authoritative in nature.”

Why?  Because websites that exhibit authority become popular places people like to go online, and when searching on Google, Google wants you to be pleased with its search results by sending you to a website that is considered an authority or useful to others regarding the subject you searched for on Google.
So how does one build a website or blog that exhibits “authority?’  Quite simple, by adding great and useful content regularly.  For you see, Google has learned and trained its spiders (by regularly updating its algorithms) how to electronically recognize websites that exhibit authority.

To understand how Google does this, we first must know a little about human behavior and consider ways that Google can measure human behavior via electronic means.  First, it stands to reason that if you’re publishing content people find useful and meaningful, they will begin to mention something you’ve said and/or link to you from their websites or blogs.  Google has ways of knowing how many incoming links are pointed to your website.  As this number grows you are considered more popular by Google’s search engine.  Thus, popularity is an excellent measure of authority in Google’s books.  In essence, the greater authority you become in your subject, the more people will write and talk about you online, and the more often they will link to your website.

But Google has other ways of measuring authority (and popularity).  If you’re a user of Google’s email program Gmail, have the Google Toolbar installed on your web browser, use Google Reader, Google Analytics, Feedburner or a host of other Google owned tools, then Google has many eyes watching where you’re going online or who’s viewing our website online.  Google’s regularly recording and dissecting this information and determining just how well your website is perceived as a place of authority.

In a nutshell, people follow and respond to people they perceive to be more important others  (i.e., people in authority).  And consequently, Google has invented ways to discover who the Internet public perceives as “important people” and ranks important web pages and websites higher than others.

Now you can see why I refer to search engine marketing as a whole new paradigm from what it used to be just a few short years ago.  And although the contents of what I’ve revealed in this blog post will discourage many, those that have come to realize what they’re up against online and will take my advice and begin creating good content regularly will ultimately become the authoritative websites in the electronic eyes of the search engine, and will begin “attracting” an ever-growing crowd of followers.  As you build more content you’ll begin to have more pages rank high in Google (and other search engines), and with an ever-growing number of high ranking pages in the search engine listings, you’ll have an ever-growing stream of traffic, followers and customers.

Isn’t that the true essence of attraction marketing after all?

 

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom!
Monique Bradford - The WifeyMommyPreneur~

How to De-Stress as A Stay-At-Home Mom

Being a stay at home mom may sound like an easy job. Truth is, it can be hard and stressful...believe me I know! It's a full time job, even if you're not a stay at home mom. But through all the runny noses, wooden blocks thrown everywhere, and yup even toothpaste on the mirror...it's worth it all.

Here are some helpful tips on how to de-stress your day as a Stay-At-Home Mom!  :)

Instructions

1. Dress Up, wake up early to get ready for the day wear something comfortable that will make you feel good about yourself, even if all you do is stay home. If you need to go anywhere you're ready to go. Looking frumpy will only make you feel frumpy.
   
   
2. Exercise, it will make you feel better and give you more energy for chasing around your little one. Whether you go for a ten minute walk around the block, do yoga or simply stretch it will help you to de-stress.
   
   
3. Take Pictures, they don't have to be perfect pictures. The best pictures are snapped when your kids are not even looking at the camera. who knows maybe you can start a scrapbook about how curious your kids were when they were small. I take my camera everywhere, snap pictures then go back and see them and realize i took some good ones.
   
   
4. Put your kids on a schedule, that way they know what time they're supposed to go to sleep each night. This will give you time to take a warm bath and take some time for yourself before you go to sleep.

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom~
Monique Bradford - The WifeyMommyPreneur~ 

Model Makeup Tips For Photography Sessions

Wonderful Tips from my friends "Makeup Artist" on Facebook!
http://www.facebook.com/click4makeupartists

You most likely already know how to apply makeup for everyday use but there are a few things that are different in applying makeup for a model photo shoot.
It's not that difficult to learn and if you follow the tips below, you will be on your way to better makeup results for your model session.

Apply a heavier coat

The first key to model makeup is to simply fix your face as if you were going out for the evening, wearing more than for daytime use.
Create extra contrast and especially use more powder. I cannot stress powder enough. This is essential!
To achieve that natural look in your model portfolio, apply a little more than you would in your daily activities and even more than you would if you were going out for the evening.
When you look in the mirror you will feel that you are wearing too much makeup but remember that the studio lights will reduce the amount of makeup you have on so don't worry.

How do you achieve the model look? Follow the simple steps listed here and, with a little practice, you should be able to get the results you're after and have a successful makeup session.

Moisturizer & Concealer

First, moisturize your face thoroughly and then follow with concealer. The concealer you use for photos should be 2 or 3 shades lighter than your skin tone.
You will use concealer in order to hide blemishes, to lighten your eyes and you'll need concealer to hide any discoloration around the eyes or lips.

The Foundation

Now, you'll want to use a good, solid foundation and apply it evenly over the face.
Foundation application is very simple but is misunderstood by even some professional makeup artists.
Match the foundation to your chin and neckline. If you miss this step, you and the camera will see a sudden change of color from your face to the neck or upper chest.

Some makeup artists even apply makeup to the neck and shoulders! Why you ask? To match the body to the face. You will have no need to apply makeup to your body (except to hide blemishes) if you follow the suggestion of matching your makeup from the face to the neck.

When you have completed applying your foundation, just apply the rest of your facial makeup as you would normally but apply in heavier amounts for the camera and lights.

Powder

Powder! Powder! Powder! Be sure to remember the powder!
I'm sure you've seen makeup artists apply makeup to actors to get them ready for a TV show or the movies. If you have you must have noticed that the makeup artist is constantly patting the actors face with a powder applicator. Have you wondered why?
The reason is that powder, and lots of it, is nescessary to create that beautiful matte finish which is always present in a great portfolio. "But I never use powder." you may say. Even so, please use it for your model photo shoot. Powder makes the difference between a beautiful photo and just a photo.

When applying powder, use a lighter shade under the eyes to help eliminate any shadows or dark circles that the concealer didn't take care of.

Applying Facial Makeup - The Oval Look

Now that you understand the importance of using powder, apply makeup below your cheekbones and under your chin to create an oval look to the face. Be sure to blend the makeup in and not create distinct lines. Put this makeup on a little darker but not too heavy.

Lip Color

In order for your lips to stand out and be noticed, be sure that your lip gloss is a solid color and at least one shade deeper than you normally wear it.
Your lip liner should be the same color as your lipstick.

Do Not Wear Black Lip Liner

Stay away from any frosted lip colors entirely because they hardly show up on film and will give the illusion that you are not wearing lip color at all. The only time you would wear frosted is when it's for some effect the photographer wants to accomplish.

Blush

Apply your blush a little heavier than normal but neatly and precisely. Don't over or under apply blush. This will also be in accordance to the effect you or your photographer want to accomplish with your look for this particular model shoot.

Eye Makeup

In order to produce the best results, your eye liner needs to be applied starting from the outside of the lower part of the eye and extending about 3/4 length toward the inner part.Really work on those eyes and lips. These are the two key features in a model photo shoot as with just about any other people photography so get this right!
You'll need to use an eye shadow to compliment the rest of your makeup and clothing but use a light shade so that your eyes will appear more alive.

Start by applying your eye shadow to the upper eye lid and above the eye just below the eyebrow.

The reason you'll want this a light shade is because a darker shade will create an illusion of darkening of the eyes and will give the appearance that you did not get enough sleep the night before which is not going to be very flattering to you. Stay with a light eye shadow to be sure and create the best results for your eyes. If done right, the person looking at your photos will be drawn in directly to your eyes first which is what you normally want to achieve.

Romantic Ideas To Spice Up Your Relationship!

Make a little loving gesture every day for one full year. Cuddle on the sofa and watch a movie. Take a bubble bath together. Walk on the beach in the moonlight. Put a note in a romance novel saying, "The story is great but our own love story is the best". Put a single red rose on the seat of your lover's car before they go to work. Send your lover a virtual postcard at least once a week. Get every book ever written by your loved one's favorite author. Get every movie starring your lovers favorite actor. Keep twenty pounds of your lovers favorite candy on hand. Take her to see the movie Titanic fifteen times. Make love to him/her every night until he/she asks you to stop. Give him/her twelve dozen roses on all their special days. Compose a list: "101 Reasons Why You're the Greatest" Write each reason on a separate square of paper. Wrap them in a fancy gift box. Sprinkle perfume on to light bulb. When light is turned on the scent of the perfume will fill the room. Relax with a glass of white wine. Listen to a romantic audio tape, fix a cup of hot flavored tea, and light two candles. Keep a journal of your romantic fantasies. Share it with your soul mate. Buy a bunch of fish at a pet store. It doesn't matter what kind. Leave it for your lover with a note saying " Out of all the fish in the sea, you are the one for me". Take a picture of yourself in the most sexy outfit possible. Hide in a secret spot in your house and leave him or her clues on how to get there. Watch the sparks fly! Put a blindfold on your lover and drive them to a place where you have a blanket, candles, strawberries, sparkling drinks, and a rose. Park the car and take off the blindfold while you read a poem you have written for them. While your lover is in the shower, or bath, put their bath towel in a hot dryer for a few minutes. Greet them when they get out of the shower with the toasty towel. Pull the bag out of your lovers breakfast cereal box and slit a small hole in it. Insert a love note. Tape up the bag and return it to the box. What a way to start the day! Write a list of 50 or more things you like or love about your sweetheart. Unplug the TV set. Put a note on the screen saying, "Turn Me on Instead". Play "hide-and-seek" in the rain. It's fun and VERY sensual! Build your lover a web page telling them why you love them so much. Mention special moments and add some images and cool links to topics that interest them. Surf the web with them one day and just "stumble upon it". Or have someone send them an anonymous email with the link inviting them to the page. Fill bathtub with warm water sprinkled with rose petals. Fix a hot cup of Raspberry Chocolate, cuddle in a warm afghan and watch An Affair to Remember. Place a perfumed handkerchief in the dryer with your sheets before drying. Send your love a letter with confetti hearts inside of the letter so they pour out everywhere when your sweetheart opens it. Invite your sweetie to an intimate dinner at your place. Make a pizza and with the pepperoni you can write something sweet, like "you are the one for me". Surprise your lover with a kiss before they can finish a sentence. Write your own love poems then record them on a tape and give them to your sweetheart. Give your love an antique compass and say "You will never lose me". Your love will swear the needle always points to their heart! While your love takes a shower, write the words "I love you" in the condensation of the bathroom mirror. Leave a trail of "Hershey's chocolate kisses" from the front door to the bedroom, right up to the bed. On the bed leave a note that reads 'I kiss the ground you walk on.' Make sure you're not home when s/he gets in! Write a love note or poem on a piece of paper and then cut it up into puzzle-like pieces. Send one a day to your special someone. Play the game of monopoly with a few new rules. Change boardwalk into backrub, and Tennessee into take your shirt off. Every time you pass go, you get a kiss. etc. Look straight into the eyes of your love and PAY ATTENTION to what they tell you! Tell your mate something about you that no one else knows. Look into the eyes of your special someone often. "The eyes are the window to the soul". Weave love, sex, intimacy, passion and romance into the fabric of your daily lives. Carve "His" and "Hers" jack-o-lanterns at Halloween. Buy a set of matching silk pajamas, and take turns modeling them for each other. Go through revolving doors with your lover. Camp-out in a tent with your lover and picnic in a tree house Men: Talk more. Women: Touch more. Spend one solid hour exploring various kissing techniques. Turn your "bedroom" into a "boudoir". Use soft colors and fabrics, fresh cut flowers on your  nightstand,  mirrors everywhere, etc. Hang your lovers Favorite art on your walls.

Hey Beautiful~

Tip: Hey Beautiful~ Practice feeling beautiful. When you catch yourself looking good, take a minute and hold it. Stay in that place for a moment - feel it, and hold it. We often will reinforce to ourselves when we don’t think we look so good and rarely reinforce when we do. FEEL it, and hold it. Maybe add a little verbal spice - say to yourself: “I look gorgeous!” So savour those moments, and you will have more of them.

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom!

Monique Bradford - The WifeyMommyPreneur~ 

 

Are You Really Wired For Home Business? How's Your Self-Esteem?

I know a lot of people who are involved in online marketing tend to focus on teaching marketing as a way to generate leads, train their team and build their profile.

I wholeheartedly believe in doing this and employ this approach myself. However, what I have found from many years of dealing with people is that you can learn all of the marketing techniques you like but if you do not have a healthy level of self esteem, you will not be able to build an effective business.

This industry revolves around our ability to relate well to others and if you are struggling in this area you will be severely hindered. You may be able to generate lots of leads, but once those people find out where you are at, they won’t stick around anymore.

Simply put, they won’t join your team.
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Do You Have Healthy Self Esteem?

Our self image has a profound impact on who we are and what we get back from the world around us.
Our self image is simply a combination of all of the input that we have had from our time of birth to the present. When we were born we had very little input to equip us for the life ahead. Over time we accumulate ideas as we evaluate the world around us and the feedback we get from it.

All of this data that is put in front of us over the years combines to form our own opinions on who we are and our place in this world.

Over time these beliefs form part of our subconscious mind that help define who we are today. In reality, what you do on a daily basis is being lived out of your subconscious database. Most of the time you live your life on autopilot as you maneuver your way through the day.

The messages we internalize as we grow can either be positive or negative. If they are positive we will develop a healthy self esteem but if they are negative we will develop an unhealthy self esteem.

Think about the input that you have had through your life. Has it been positive or negative? If you have had a negative stream of input throughout your life, don’t despair because you can change your internal belief system with a little work.

Below is a set of questions that form key indicators as to where you are at in regard to your self esteem. They are simply locators and are not here to help you overcome a poor self image in any way.

If you find that you do have some negative self beliefs that are affecting your business please seek some help. It is not a difficult process to overcome negative self beliefs with a little application and persistence.

Key Indicators To A Healthy Self Esteem

This is a list of some key indicators for someone with a healthy self esteem. As you go through the list you might like to ponder each point and write out how you feel about it.

• Are you able to live in the moment, for today, and not worry about the past or the future?
• Does your past bother you and do you have fear about the future?
• Is what you are doing in your life right now consistent with what you want and where you want to go?
• Are you open to new opinions and ideas?
• Are you open to gaining new knowledge or is this type of thing threatening to you?
• Are you committed to learning more, discovering more & advancing more or do you live internally with a sense of retreat?
• Are you aware of what you believe and does involuntary prejudice take over and cause you to make irrational decisions?
• Are you in control of your emotions or do you find yourself getting out of control internally when confronted with situations, ideas or opinions that are contrary to what you believe?
• Are you on your own side or do you beat yourself up internally?
• Are you in control of your feelings or do you deny your feelings?
• Are you able to separate a person from their actions?
• Can you look beyond what someone else does to see where they are at or are you offended by their actions?
• Are you responsible for your choices & actions or do you blame other?
• Can you control yourself in the company of others or are you moved to behave differently than what you normally would do?
• Do you change to suit the other person or group or are you secure to be who you are?
• Do you feel responsible for controlling your own time or do other people control what you do and when?
• Are you responsible for your own happiness or is your happiness dictated by outside forces?
• Do you live by your own values or the values of others?
• Does your self esteem come from within you or do you need constant reassurance from those around you?
• Do you think for yourself or do you need others to help you make choices?
• Are you willing to confront life or does life cause you to retreat?
• Do you live each day with purpose living to fulfill your goals?Can you identify the necessary steps to achieve your goals?
• Are you able to monitor your behavior to ensure that it is congruent with your goals?
• Do you take responsibility for your own behavior or does someone else “make you do it”
• Are you able to confess you did wrong and apologize?
• Are you able to make things right if you do wrong?

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So there you go, a set of questions to act as locators. As mentioned you could become absolutely brilliant at lead generation and flop completely when it comes to being able to relate and interact with the people you come in contact with.

If after reading over these questions you find yourself lacking in self esteem then at least you will know where you stand. It should give you an indication of whether you may need some assistance in this area and whether you would like to continue or give the home business industry a big miss.

As a word of encouragement, I have heard of some tremendous stories of people with low self esteem go on in this industry and achieve phenomenal results. It can be done and it is being done every day.

There is no reason why you cannot do the same. But it will never happen for you if you can’t locate where you are at and admit that you may need some help if you are in that category. If you find that you do have low self esteem, admit it, get some help and move on in life.

Written By Guest Author: Greg Martin  

Body Image and Self-Esteem~

I snatched this article right off of one of my favorite websites: www.PositiveLivingTV.com  So that I could share it with all of my wonderful readers!  xoxo  It is also a TV Show that comes on Ion Life,  I try to catch the program as often as I can.  I thought that this article had some great tips on how to Boost Our Self-Esteem during those times when all we can see are our Flaws~  I highlighted the Self-Esteem Boosting Tips for those of you that want to get straight to it! 

Always wishing you Health, Wealth and Wisdom~

Monique Bradford - The WifeyMommyPreneur~  

 

I had just spent an hour with my trainer Rusty lifting weights, run 35 minutes on the treadmill, taken my Dalmatian Lucy for a vigorous 40-minute walk, and then driven to the YMCA for an hour-long stretch class. Exhausted, I had to ask why exercise was ruling my life. I feel better when I exercise, I rationalized. Taking a deep breath, I delved deeper and as I did, I began to see that my obsession with exercise was rooted more in vanity than any health benefits I hoped to receive. I had to admit that the primary reason I work out is to look good. The way I view my body determines in good part my self-esteem.

Self-esteem is the sum total of how much we like and approve of our self-concept; Webster's Dictionary defines it simply as "self-respect." In America these days, how much we respect ourselves may hinge in large part on how we look. Some psychologists claim most people's body image is so bad that having a bad body image is "normal." According to the American Psychological Association, 30 to 40 percent of Americans are somewhat unhappy with their appearance, and another 45 percent may experience anxiety or depression because they dislike their appearance.

In an era of gender equality, Americans' obsession with body image is almost equally divided among the sexes. One body-image study found that 55 percent of all women were dissatisfied with their physiques, followed closely by men at 45 percent.

So how can we feel better about our bodies and bolster our sagging self-esteem? I went to the Internet for answers and my research yielded these five suggestions.
ONE: Quit dissecting your body. People generally look at some small part of the body they don't like and stake everything on it. Instead of fixating on a flaw, take several steps back, squint your eyes and peer through your lashes. Look at yourself the way the world does, through a soft focus. The world sees the whole you, not just one feature. Love the whole you.

Some makeup artists tell their clients not to look at themselves too closely in the mirror. They explain that no one else views us as critically as we view ourselves. No one stares at the blemish on our cheek or the line in our forehead like we do. Instead, they admire the big picture; they admire all of us—mind, body and spirit.

TWO: Focus on presence, not perfection. Do you remember those girls and guys in high school who were popular but not pretty? Chances are they had presence. Presence is far more attractive to both sexes than physical beauty. After all, physical beauty is relative.

THREE: Accentuate the positive. You can probably name those aspects of yourself that you dislike, but can you name those features about yourself you admire? Maybe you have shiny, healthy hair, or clear, supple skin. Whatever your favorite features are, play them up. Get a manicure or give your hair a deep conditioning treatment. Dress up your self-esteem by taking care of your appearance. Wear clothes that fit and make you feel good about your body.

Speak lovingly and positively to yourself and fight negative mind talk by complimenting yourself. Look for the good and praise it.

FOUR: Befriend your body. Instead of torturing your body by dieting and exercise, pamper it. Get a massage, take a hot bath, go dancing, and indulge in your favorite foods from time to time (it will help prevent binging). Get into your body and enjoy it for the wonderful machine it is.

FIVE: Focus on who you are, not how you look. Acknowledge the whole you and not just your body. What are your talents, gifts and dreams? Think of all the lives you have touched. Create a feel-good box. Find a box or basket (I have a file) and every time someone gives you a compliment write it down on a piece of paper and drop it in. My file includes notes of appreciation as well as gift cards. And when I am feeling blue, I revisit it.

As I thought more about my body image, I came to realize that for the most part I like my body. Looking around me, most people I know don't look like the models on the covers of Vogue and Men's Health. They are real people like me. I have been working out not for me, but for an ideal that I can never, and really don't want to, meet.

Like most things in life, I have come to realize that the motivation for working out is as important as the act itself. I want to work out for me, because of the way it makes me feel, not to gain other people's admiration. Learning to do things for ourselves may be the surest way to bolster our self-esteem.

About the Author: "The Career Engineer" Randy Siegel works with organizations to take high-potential employees and give them the leadership and communications skills they need to be successful. Electrify your career by subscribing to his monthly e-Newsletter “Stand in Your Power!” at www.powerhousecommunications.com. Article Source: ArticleBase.com.

Advice For The Marriage and The Business~ *Communication*

As most of you know, I do have a Lingerie and Romance Accessories Business.  One of the reasons that I started a business in the romance industry is because a happy, healthy and thriving marriage is very important to me.  I figure if you're gonna go through the whole marriage ceremony and repeat those wonderful marriage vows, then why not put in the work to actually live out those vows?  Especially if you have children!  That's right, I said "the work", because that's exactly what it is and don't let anybody tell you different.  We don't live in fairytale land, you have to actually work at a great marriage.  Take a look at the image of the couple above.  Have you ever felt like that?  Believe it or not there are people living out that image daily in their marriage.  It should not be this way.  I shared a quote on facebook today that I thought was so real.  It's by Scott Gardner, "If the marriage ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."  And all my married people know what I'm talking about!  It's hard to function properly when your marriage is on the rocks, let alone be happy.

When looking at statistics and the media about marriage all I see is divorce and prenuptial agreement advise.  Some people go from marriage to marriage to yet another marriage.  And some are scared to death of marriage for fear of getting hurt.  Marriage is definitely not for the faint of heart.  Hear me when I say, "YOU ARE NOT GOING TO GET EVERYTHING YOU WANT AND YOU WILL HAVE TO BEND AND SACRIFICE IF YOU WANT TO LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER WITH SOMEONE ELSE. REMEMBER... YOU'RE NOT MARRYING YOURSELF.  YOU ARE NOW 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE BOUND TOGETHER AS 1 BOTH LEGALLY AND SPIRITUALLY IN HOLY MATRIMONY.  Special ain't it? :)  I'm not claiming to be a marriage expert but I can say that I am absolutely and truly happily married and have been for over 7 years.  I've been with my husband for over 11 years all together.  I have picked up a few things along the way.  Not to mention seeing my mother stick with her man (my wonderful step-father) in marriage since I was just a 1 year old little bundle of joy.  Oh yeah!  And I can't forget about my grandparents (Mama and Papa) that have been together since my mother was a pre-teen.  Hey...I'm just sayin'!  I really don't believe that people get married to get a divorce.  I believe that people get married wanting to spend the rest of their life with that one special person.  I personally think that Romance and Fun can definitely keep the marriage just that....Romantic and Fun!  Hence, RomanceAndFunShop.com ;)  Hey... It works for me!

With all that said, I came across this article on www.marriageadvise.com about communication and active listening.  As I was reading the article I noticed that the advise being given can also be applied to business.  You must be an active listener in order to run your business successfully.  How else will you know how to meet the needs of your clients and business associates?  So here is a copy of the article.  Enjoy and let me know what you think and feel free to share.

Always wishing you health, wealth and wisdom!
Monique Bradford~ The WifeyMommyPreneur

The Key To Successful Relationships

By Michele Germain

Relationships can be the most difficult and joyful part of your life. You cannot avoid them unless you never get out of bed in the morning and sometimes not even then. You will find yourself interfacing with others almost immediately each day.

Due to the complex multiple roles you have in your life this can be plentiful. On an average day you could be talking to your husband, wife, co-workers, children, siblings, friends, parents, our children teachers, your significant other, your boss, the grocery clerk and at the end of the day it could be a telecommunication caller. 

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One Of The Most Important Skills
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One of the most important skills that you need in any and all of these relationships is listening. Better listening skills will allow you to create a more harmonious relationship where respect and cooperation are more likely to occur. 

So ask yourself now, "How well do I really listen to others? How well do I listen to myself? Can I be still and quiet enough to really listen?" Or do I feel restless when there is silence and so I start talking right away? Here are some tips on developing better listening skills. 

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Developing Better Listening Skills
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1. Listen with concern and a desire to understand.

Do not pretend to be listening or give only part of your attention if you are distracted. If you need and it is possible, ask the person to wait until you can be more attentive. 

 

2. Let the other person talk without interrupting.

Avoid quickly giving advice interrupting or making assumptions as to what you think they are going to say. Pause and breathe staying present and silent until he/she is finished. 

3. Do not prepare your answer while they are talking.

Try to stay only in the listening mode. Once you have all the information you will be more prepared to respond. 

4. Do not engage in selective listening.

Listen to the words, facts and overall content of the person’s story. Do not just pay attention to what you find interesting. 

5. While you are listening observe their facial expressions, gestures, eye movement and body posture.

This will give you information as to what they might be feeling about their conversation, more information to help you understand. 

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Learn To Reflect Back
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The second part of the skill is learning to reflect back what you heard the person saying. Paraphrasing and repeating back what you heard allows the person to know you have been listening. It keeps clarity in conversation and allows for overall better communication. This is also a skill that requires some practice. Here are a few tips.

1. Try to briefly summarize what you heard them say and repeat it back to them.

2. Ask them is this is what they were trying to tell you. If not, try again to summarize or ask them to repeat part of what you did not understand.

3. Do not immediately respond with your belief, opinion or advise before you have clarified their position.

4. Only give advice if they are asking for it.

5.Use empathy in your response instead of being judgmental. Be neutral and clarify what you heard their feelings, thoughts or opinions are.

6. Do not yell, argue or criticize. Ask more questions. Try asking why, when, where or who questions. This gives you more information.

7. Determine what they need from you. Would they like you just to listen and say nothing, give feedback, provide advice, help them problem solve a situation.

Of course, if you are talking to young children you may have to interrupt this yourself and offer what your intuition feels they need. 

Whether you are in contact with your children, boss, husband, or wife or significant others these tools are valuable. For the next week or so try to exercise these new skills. Observe what happens when you listen and respond in an empathic manner instead of with advise, opinion or judgments. 

Make a note of the new interaction and compare it with your old way of listening or not listening. Observe their manner; are they calmer, more appreciate? What do you notice? 

We all have a need to be listened to and understood. Most of us grew up with not enough of the focused attention we need. As a result we are all a little deprived, that is why so many of us want to talk and talk and talk and listening is something that we just don’t know how to do. In fact we are uncomfortable with being quiet and still. 

I suggest to you that if you practice you will benefit in many ways. All your relationships will dramatically improve. You will find that you will gain a greater ability to listen to yourself and you may find that others more readily give you time and attention. 

What we need from others we must be willing to give to them as well. Be patient, praise yourself for your efforts (don’t wait for others to praise you), and watch your skill grow. 

 

Michele Germain, author of The Jill Principle, has a master degree in Social Worker from Wayne State University and is licensed as a Clinical Social Worker and Marriage Family Therapist in California. She is a Certified Bioenergetic Analyst, offering an approach that that resolves the emotional pain remaining in the body, increasing the individuals well being and capacity for pleasure. She conducts workshops and seminars on a variety of mental health topics and life changing issues. She has appeared on radio, cable television and in print media, and lectures aboard major cruise ship lines such as the Pearl and Royal Caribbean. For more information visit www.michelegermain.com.